Voices

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Voices

We are surrounded with voices that tell us what we should do.  There’s the radio, the TV, the newspaper, our friends and family.  The list is endless.  Sometimes it makes it extremely difficult to determine which voice is the correct one.  Even in church, we can be bombarded by the voices of people who feel the need to give us their opinions on issues when we didn’t even ask for their advice.

Many times, I think we have the assumption that the older ladies in the church have much wisdom to share.  While they should have much wisdom to share, there are times when that just isn’t true.  I have seen a few cases where an older woman is nothing more than a busybody, feeling the need to voice her opinion on every issue.

I remember a time when a couple in our church was celebrating over fifty-five years of marriage.  My husband asked the lady later what the secret was to the longevity of their marriage.  She told him that men feel the need to be right about everything, and a smart woman will just be quiet and let him think that way.  I wish I could say that I was shocked by her response, but I wasn’t.  You see, I have seen this older lady in action for years.  Her comment made her husband look really bad.  It was a ‘man-bashing’ comment.  Quite honestly, the need to be right is not just a ‘man thing.’  We all struggle with that issue.  This woman obviously had no idea of what being a help meet was.

A friend of mine shared a time when she and her husband felt that they should get their children involved in an activity that would take up two evenings a week.  Because of taking on this new commitment, she felt the need to step away from a Bible study that was taking place at their church.  (Keep in mind that her family was still going to be attending Sundays and Wednesdays.)  She had several ladies pressuring her to be at this Bible study.  They continued to pressure her even after she expressed that she and her husband felt that this activity was not for them at this time.  She got no affirmation from anybody in the church that she was making the right choice.

When you face times like these, remember that even Jesus said and did things that people didn’t understand.  They were quite vocal in voicing their opinions too!  Some of them were so angry with Him that they decided to throw Jesus off of a cliff.  I love what Jesus did in this situation!  He simply walked right through the crowd and went on His way.  (Luke 4:30)  He didn’t seek their approval.  His approval came from God.  It’s the same for us.  When we know deep in our heart that we are doing the correct thing, we need to remember that it is God’s approval we are seeking, and not the approval of men.  Keeping this in mind makes it easier for us to avoid listening to the wrong voices.

For those who may be married to an unbelieving husband, please don’t let what others think of you take precedence over what your husband thinks of you.  Many times, after a wife gets saved, she quickly wants to get involved in her local church.  While there’s nothing wrong with this, if you see that your husband is quite upset over it, it might be best for you to stay home with him.  You could still get the sermon on tape, watch preaching on TV when your husband isn’t around, and invite some Christian ladies over for some fellowship when he isn’t home.  You may even find a women’s Bible study that meets during the hours when your husband is working.  In this way, you will still be fulfilling the admonition of Hebrews 10:25 that urges us not to give up meeting together with fellow Christians.

There will likely be some well-intentioned ladies may try to sway you to be there for every single service, but these ladies probably haven’t had to live with an unsaved husband who resents these new affections in his wife’s heart.  After all, she’s has a new lover – Jesus, the lover of her soul.  Don’t be swayed by their voices.  By continuing to attend church services when your husband is adamantly opposed to it, you may turn his heart from ever desiring to follow the Lord.  Yet, if you follow the biblical mandate to have the unfading beauty of a spirit that is quiet and gentle, you are going to have your husband wondering just what has taken hold of you!  (I Peter 3:4)

What voices are you hearing?

© 2005, Stacy R. Miller

 

 

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